I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I'm gonna write a book, Things that go bump in the night: The story of Katelyn. Chapter one, my roommate is a dumb whore.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
Totally just met the chick getting nailed in our lobby last night. Should I bring it up?
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Birthday Treasure Hunt was to follow the clues. At each spot there was a stick on tattoo and a shot and at the end there was 2 cases of beer. I have 13 tattoos and don't remember turning 18.
Man in California was arrested for killing and eating a wild bobcat while high on crystal meth. Let's please NEVER get that high on anything...
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
the tv said "its small, its comfortable..." and i started laughing... safe to say he lost any dignity he had left...
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Not all of us can be into hot dads. Some of us have to have commitment issues and be into musicians.
Randomize
