You sent me a text calling me "cunt" while i was in the middle of dumping my bf.
So we're fucking tonight?
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
What. The. Fuck. No, you will not spank me.
That wasn't intended for you, my bad.
Do you remember trying to eat gravel when we were walking back to the dorm?
his phone is always ringing though. It makes me feel like I'm dating a doctor who's always on call.
yeah, dating a doctor sounds much better than fucking your drug dealer.
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
My booty call made my bed while I was in the shower. I may have to marry him.
You handed me your heels and said, "barefoot running is all the rage." Then you proceeded to run home.
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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