A girl just told me I should smile because I was surrounded by hot girls. I told her that clearly beauty was in the eye of the beholder. And she slapped me!
I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
I need a vacation from myself..this is duely noted after I tried giving myself a concussion last night
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
How do you explain to a guy that he's like a little puppy dog that you play with, but then leave at the shelter to go home to your German Shepard?
If his smile makes you freak out and drop things imagine what his penis could do
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
We blew shit up to. With a cannon.
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