Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I texted him to clear the air a bit, apologized if I freaked him out. No reply. So I'm gonna go ahead and fuck someone in a barn tonight.
He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
Two girls are now jumping in the ocean naked at 10 PM...and I was just starting to hate Ocean City
If you're going to outback I'll have to decline, I've slept with a large enough portion of their staff already.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
I just got through airport security with 5 grams of weed in my back pocket. Either I deserve a metal or the government is slacking
It was weird, it was like my heart got a boner. Is this being an adult?
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
Randomize