It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we found a loaf of bread in my bathroom i believe its yours. sorry i took a shower before we noticed so it might be soggy
did you by any chance leave me that 7 minute long voicemail of you running and constantly tripping into bushes?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
She took her panties off, then farted in my general direction. I guess we're at that stage in our relationship.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I shit you not. Dude complemented me for being meme savvy. You could drown a toddler in my panties right now.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
You kept sayin "its alright, I'm pre-med" to everything we said. EVERYTHING.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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