There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
I woke up and my clothes were soaked in the shower and I was wearing a Ghostbusters uniform. I'm shocked she hasn't left me yet.
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
The rest of us are chipping in to soundproof your bedroom. This is getting ridiculous.
I woke up to the sound of gentle rain, only to realize I was laying under a urine trough in the men's restroom. Fuck you, bourbon. Fuck you.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
What kind of present accurately says to my male suitemate "I'm sorry that I accidentally flashed you my vagina while I was super drunk"?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
We almost ended up sober because of u!!
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Just went to Meijer. Purchased furnace filters, fishing line, red lipstick and pregnancy test. And if my purchase alone wasn't classy enough, I took the pregnancy test in the Meijer bathroom because Im on my way to the bar and wanted to know if that was a good idea or not. Cheers to no babies!
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