Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
My gynecologist just commented on how well my vagina was waxed
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
The stripper on stage Is eating a mozzarella stick while on the pole....that's a new level of I don't give a fuck
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Just sneezed out a half gram of coke into a tissue. Four hours after the fact. The bender continues.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
and i think wearing the clothes from last night are out of the question...was there mud wrestling there? because i look like a participated..with a cat.
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
Randomize
