these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
That sound you heard was the sound of millions of brackets exploding simultaneously
He likes Jesus. Game over.
Oooh wait, he just told me he was high.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
You want a summary? Scottish women that start drinking at 7 am. Cherries soaked in moonshine. Japanese beer. Old men smoking stuff that I'm pretty sure is illegal here and in Japan. One is doing a karaoke striptease. There's your summary.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I'm like a hairless cat ready to be ravished
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
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