i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
You're the only chick there. That's not an orgy, that's called a gang bang...
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
i just saw a guiness commercial where the guiness was on the verge of spilling the whole time. i was on the edge of my seat scared shitless. im an alcoholic.
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
I ate breakfast with him. And by ate breakfast I mean we fucked on the kitchen table.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
I literally am filling up a victoria's secret bag with stuff that would give my parents a heart attack to hide in my roommates' room. This is being an adult when parents visit
for future reference, singing eye of the tiger outside my door while i am having sex makes me incredibly uncomfortable
apparently not uncomfortable enough for you to stop
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize