god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
Old men and throwing up are my life now.
i like him when i'm sober AND when i'm drunk.i've been searching for this my whole life
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
Breaking hearts and overdosing on semen. That's my life.
I definitely recall eating shredded cheese out of the bag while you were wearing that apron.
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
A girl just invited me over for a blowjob and beer. Is this a trap?
I suggest both. Please have sex with them and prepare notes for a final comparison.
Randomize