you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
I have yet found the courage to put pants on. No judgement thursday led to no shower friday and now no pants saturday. God i miss college.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
I'm at a bar. It's body paint Wednesday. All of the waitresses are topless. Help me
I vaguely remember hanging my bra off the ceiling fan and chugging a beer during sex
College has turned you into quite the multi tasker huh?
there are no losers in shot checkers. only winners.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
so idk what that means but now because of me he has a police file as breaking into my apartment and sleeping in my hallway under the carpet
Randomize
