I just had unprotected sex with a stranger. but i did him wearing nothing but my pearls. so its classy.
im learning from these one night stands last time i came in her this time i came on her AND deleted every contact in her phone!
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
we smoked out of your homemade aunt jamima bong
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
He told me we shouldn't hang out because it would be weird and then snap chatted me a picture of his dick
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
I wanted to write an apology letter to my vagina after that.
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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