thats the last time i clean cum out of my retainer.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
I consider it a successful poop when you only have to wipe once.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
I had a moment while I was smoking where I was looking at these palm trees and I knew how dr Seuss came up with his characters.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hes trying to fuck me on a bear rug. Not saying no.
Also this is super embarrassing but sorry for licking your chest
Awwww breaks my heart, I just wanna fix his teeth and give him a blowjob.
You drink too much. You cuss too much. You have questionable morals. You're everything I've ever wanted in a friend.
Who brings nunchucks to a funeral?
It's a lot harder to work after sex than it is to work drunk... just saying.
Randomize