I remember having a drink with vegetables in it. They said it was a mojito, but it tasted like cabbage.
haha i love mojitos
ya and i hate cabbage
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
Someone just bought me a one liter long island and call me maybe is on. I'm going to die
he gave me a thermos so I could take my coffee with my on drive of shame. I was unexpectedly grateful...
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
He staggered in with his pants around his ankles and yelled that he lost his pants
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
You can either drink his whiskey or be a bitch. Doing both is just mean.
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