Well apparently he's into motor boating.
I just came out of my doctor's office and i look into the window and i see a guy sitting in the front seat getting head.
why are you so shocked? you live in brooklyn.
i just put a booger in my mom's hair and i just needed to tell someone.
i carry sandwiches in my pockets more than any normal person should
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theres so much semen in my vacuum cleaner...
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
I know. She seems like she getting that "need some dick" restlessness. Might explain the feisty attitude
I think I broke a hole in her wall trying to do backflips
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
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I can pinpoint my loss of innocence as the moment I started masturbating with my teddy bears
You fell out of the chair and then lifted your foot saying, "If my foot could give you the middle finger it would."
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?