It's like the water temple from zelda. but with more tits.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
Just made my alarm the Lion King song. Too excited about waking up to sleep.
He sent a pic, I sent one back. Then nothing. It's like we sext-messaged goodbye and ended the relationship.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
It was insane. I was drunk for 11 consecutive hours. I woke up covered in almonds and there were footprints all over my shirt
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
I lowered my expectations when he started off saying "ah missionary, my specialty"
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
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