She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
So thanks to the xanax and vodka memory erasering combo i wake up only to reopen a picture of some very familiar balls
she just walked in and said "well, I got peed on again"...
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
We turned on "find my friends" and watched her progress. Got concerned when she didn't move for an hour on Adelaide, turned out a booty call was made, then she went back to the bars.
Ladies, if you have recieved this text then you are one of the lucky few friends I have decided to make this proposal to. As you all know, my boyfriend's birthday is in two weeks and I have finally decided on the perfect present. Surprise threesome. Now, there can only be one, this isn't an orgy you know, so I will be rating the ideal candidates on bra size and sluttyness. Experiance will count, references if available. Inbox me your credentials so we can come to a...Satisfying agreement.
this temple that is my body is starting to crumble and turn into ruins
I'm trying to find a place to hide weed in my mother in law's house...
Married life problems?
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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