Made out with me girlfriend while she was peeing. all time high, or all time low?
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
But if you were going to pour a liquid on your naked body in fall its definitely pumpkin inspired something.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Not my lover. I would rather lose all my teeth, and I fucking love my teeth.
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
woke up on my floor using my jeans i wore out as a pillow
haha i wouldn't expect any less of you
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
Thank god you don't know my other address I'm safe for now
Awww you know you would like it if I found u
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