I'm gonna put my relationship status as "widowed" to see if it helps me get some poon.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
I've done unspeakable things to your penis. I have every right to give it a name.
he said i was so drunk that i shared a urinal with him and we simultainiously peed
The investigator asked if we were sharing a pitcher of margaritas. I corrected him and explained that we each had our own.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Who are these men, what are we doing here, how is this helping us toward our goals of sex and pasta? Things to consider.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
My face feels like a midget just gave birth to quintuplets
ok but bondage is pretty much my easy mode
I was trying to sext but got a notification that my dad and professor both commented on my Facebook photo. Bad timing.
I would totally suck a dick for some poutine right now
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Want to meet at a cool spot and just park like cops side-by-side and you can eat some potatoes and I can smoke a cigarette in your face?
Randomize
