Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
FB needs to have a relationship status called...screwing my roommates bf..linking their names would be an easier to tell her!
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
some girl just asked me if I was that guy that hooked up with nine girls in one night. officially a local celebrity. gonna try and autograph her boobs.
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
New low reached: a cockroach has actually drowned itself in our dirty dishes. We are heathens. Cleaning dance party tonight. No excuses.
I spy something regrettable...
Oh my god. Stop!! It was one time and I still can't believe it.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
Randomize
