it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
dude literally just took me 4 trips to take out the recycling from last night. we need to have parties like this more often
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
I woke up with the gnarliest cold/hangover combo
Thats what u get when u have butt ass naked rooftop sex at night in december
Worth it.
Considering what happened last night and how horrible I feel, I look amazing
He's a douche. But I like the way he chokes me.
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Randomize
