you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
Lady came into work yesterday. Full on stache and beard. I've never concentrated on making eye contact harder in my life.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
the thing I didn't realize I would miss about college is that at home you can't just dismiss your sex bruises as drunk accidents
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I can't tell if I'm hungover or if my cat just knocked the lamp on my face
No we are not "bros" because I came out of my moms vagina& you went in there.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Also I ordered a dildo and I'm not sure if I want it still, so there might be a free dildo in your future
Randomize
