My bad bro. I had no idea that when i suggested our triva team name be my last abortion tickled, that she would bring up cancun. Stay strong i think she really liked you
can't come out tonight. went to the bar again last night and the bartender hugged and thanked me so much for my "generosity." I'm intrigued but terrified to see my credit card bill.
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
Well I'm glad to hear the fight wasnt over his small dick.
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Pretending to be completely fried so the odd girl next to me doesnt suspect im simply staring at her.
U can be a future sentaor's wife if you want. I'm happy with "closet lesbian", "tech prof".and "masters degree" all rolled into one. Drunken bar escapades pay off.
Rule travel - in 2s or put an ankle monitor on me, and maybe a shock collar.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I'll text you when I have a mental breakdown about it.
Please do.
Randomize
