...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
so the time management class we had to take for work seems to be working. I just beat off instead of waiting for gf to get home bc it fit my schedule better.
Halfway through banging her I realized that she was playing a sex playlist on her iPod...first time actually having sex to R.Kelly's "bump and grind"
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Did you get drunk last night? You put Christian lyrics as your fb status again.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
Well sorry I accidentally spooned your mom and possibly threw up on you
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
My friend had to carry her up the steps on his shoulder, and then she got up, found an ironing board and set it up in my friend's room just in case he needed to iron things.
There's so much mac and cheese stuck to my foot right now
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
as a self proclaimed hoe im ok with a lotta things but that is not fucking one of them
Randomize
