do you know how hard it is to sit through a 3 hour movie with someone and not fuck them?
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
Dude I think I was making out with the cat last night
I don't have a cat..?
Well nonetheless. Whatever it was purred when I used tounge.
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
in literally every picture i'm wearing less and less of my costume.
First thought today, I need a ventriloquist dummy that looks like me. This week's project has been determined.
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
You pretty much isn't said it
Those words don't go together.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I would pay to watch a Bravo special of you getting Botox.
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
