You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Yeah, that's not really a good thing. Especially for a girl. You should get a tattoo on your stomach that says "Please wear a condom".
You know, he picked a really shitty time to stop sleeping with me to pay attention to his girlfriend.
Finals week has gone away, doo dah doo dah, drink martinis naked day oh da doo dah day
So burnt out. Like weed hangover. And someone just fell through the ceiling outside of my class. How's your morning going?
you got us kicked out of the restaurant for trying to pee in the trash can.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Well you wanna do it now or later? I've had three shots and I'm listening to journey by myself. Emotionally there is no better prime time than right now.
I SMOKED SO MUCH I SKIPPED A DAY.
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
Sorry, I was watching the Olympic story about the Canadian guy and drinking out of the prescription bottle and crying because it was so beautiful.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
He told me he loved me and I told him I shit myself
Randomize
