i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
I just found out me and my parents buy from the same drug dealer.
you should get a family discount.
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
This morning is cloudy with a high chance of vomiting all over the dentist. Stay tuned for further updates.
I cant. There's fences everywhere and I think I have a boyfriend. Its fabulous.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
It's supposed to be a shit show, it's an end of the world party.
Wikipedia just saved you three hours and $30 on a bar tab. You should donate.
$5. Donated.
Brb crying the tears of my youth
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Can you come unlock the door? I just peed myself on the porch.
Randomize
