what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
and i'm going to kill you for what you did to my nipples last night. of course i want to hang out
The yoga party turned into an underwear party because we are all incompetent when it comes to tying bed sheets.
This has been a Party Success Story
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I'm about to be a GTA V widow, he could at least throw me a bone. Literally.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
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