whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
someone threw a dead crab at me
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I've had to do a couple req orders today and I would like to submit to you an order form to requisition DAT ASS
I shaved my asshole for you. You WILL fuck me tonight.
Last night you referred to my vagina as a gym for your penis
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
i'm eating chex mix in the shower while texting. i feel accomplished.
Randomize
