Would we rather be in rehab with the drug addicts or the girls with low self esteem?
She must have been at ribfest tonight because my dick smells like barbeque sauce
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
So we are lighting beer bottles on fire and breaking them in half to make glasses
That sounds dangerous
Don't worry......were wearing oven mits.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
I'm like the Mother Theresa of booty calls.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
He's so drunk he thinks he's the ultimate warrior. Told cops he was from parts unknown. Never broke character
i am willing to donate my body to this science experiment when it means free blowjobs
He sent me a recycled dick pic! He could at least use one without sunlight in it, considering it's 10pm
I just coughed and my vagina hurt. We need to hook up more.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
mid-october of freshman year. goals have shifted from "no more guys on my floor" to "all the guys on my floor."
Randomize
