Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
he just found out his girl is having a boy. he's probably googling "Ed Hardy diapers" as we speak.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I think I'd do Clint Eastwood.
...kinda gettin a major gay vibe from you right now.
That was a text you sent me last night.
She just rubbed her face all over pool chalk. I feel like it's time to go
guy next to me on the train just pulled out two bottles of gin and a block of cheddar. is slowly making his way through all of them.
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I realize designer coke was a douchey thing to say but the point of the story is I did bath salts
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
You were more fun when you didn't have morals.
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
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