So #1 way to come back last night and #2 wishbone and I broke into his house and i opened joey's door and u were both passed out and pantless.
SECOND walk of shame from the westside Hilton, SECOND foreign family w kids staring at me in my dress, glitter purse, spiky heels and booze breath. I said I was going to church. More confusion.
I feel like if I were on Intervention, I would have to be a season finale.
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
Granted I did fall into a pond wearing your dress, but I did save a frog in the process so I think it was worth it.
She kept looking at me and saying "you are the scary high".
Well were gunna have to wash the couch cover now...maybe even the couch, soap or fire your decision
Also this guy fingered me at the bar and then gave me his card
ok thanks goodnight
Also before you go to bed i just have to get it out there that i really like macklemore as a person
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Can I just say how funny it is that your "respect" tattoo is right above the bruise from me slapping your ass
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
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