we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
sometimes i wish i was able to text my cat and tell him i miss him and that i'm thinking about him
having sex with you is like teaching a dog to tango, it DOESN'T work
I just called him "young grasshopper" in a conversation. THIS is why I don't get numbers when I'm sober
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
HE'S EATING THE CONFETTI. STOP HIM NOW.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I think my sex life is about to turn into a war on two fronts
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
We had sex to Hey Arnold, Rugrats, and All That. I feel like my life has come full circle.
Who put my cat in the fridge?
Randomize
