I mean, he's dancing back and forth between pathetically sad and massively fucking creepy.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
I smell like booze and the valet literally buckled me in, def top 3 walks of shame
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
She's all pretty and bubbly and nice and I'm sitting here stoned looking like Lucifer.
last night we stole an a/c window unit from a frat. gonna be a great summer
I really just want to eat 20 mcnuggets and slap everyone with the box when I'm done.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
Update: I just threw up in between cars in the parking lot of magic kingdom.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
I mean, I want you to have freaky orgasmic fun to entertain me, but I don’t want you to risk HIV or car crashes
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
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