I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
normally i would apologize for my drunk texting but even sober me agrees.
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
He let him chew on his fu man chew. The man has the patience of a saint
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
We have a little not a lot. We already rolled a blunt and named him Ron.
also new logic of mine : I fuck a Scottish kid , Scotland national animal is a Unicorn airgo I've come close to fucking a unicorns descendent, mother always said dreams come true
Last night was incredible. I can tell by the nacho cheese on my jacket
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
You ripped his router out of the wall and screamed "I have defeated the matrix"
Randomize
