I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I ended up driving home on my birthday, he opened the door to puke on the highway, and animal balloons were flying out of the car the entire time. The people behind us got a show.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Quick question. What's the protocol on going back to a bar after going home with one of their bartenders?
Go back and try to find another to go home with.
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
Apparently getting drunk at a philanthropy event and tweeting about it is "frowned up"
I might stash a bottle of vodka in your mailbox, that way if I wanna leave early I can drink in your frontyard till you get back.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
i refuse to take responsibility for eating Chuck E Cheese pizza and having any other repercussions than the shits.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
its liver damage thursday
Randomize