Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
You know its bad when you're praying for a hangover just so you aren't still drunk at work anymore.
my life is in even more shambles than last time, mcdonalds is closed
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
Realized I'm still to drunk to comprehend work emails. Marked them all as unread. Here's to responsible hang overs.
... was I dreaming when we did coke off of the xbox, or did that really happen?
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
honestly, i just want you to have sex with him too so that you can fully understand my appreciation of his dick as well.
I just sit in the cubicle for 8 hours and do keagles.
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
I tried to open a bottle of wine with toenail clippers last night. So this morning was obviously rough.
Do you know this guy sitting in front of us? Asking for my vagina.
This is either the best idea i've ever had or the worst. stay tuned.
Randomize
