Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I finally had kitchen counter sex! i was so excited
You're a big dope. Life is about fighting for what you want, not accepting what you hate.
Why does tequilla always make you text me?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
I could be a Disney star with the amount of nude photos of mine that get leaked.
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
I understand that I gave you a nose bleed with a cheeto last night and for that I apologize
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
It was kind of like hidden Mickey ears, but with dicks.
Me and dad were just reflecting on that time he found a gas mask bong in the backyard.
Randomize