sooo how much is appropriate to spend on a vibrator? what if it is really legit looking?
her vagine was all disorganized.
I just wished the taco bell drive thru guy a happy cinco de mayo. Who says arizonians hate mexicans?
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
It is way too early in the summer for me to be coming into work still drunk.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
We have an albino peacock in our apartment. It's beautiful.
Scratch it being beautiful, bitch just stole my McDonalds. Call animal control.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
Fucking a younger guy is now a game of odds. The chance that he gives me corona virus is outweighed by the evening of orgasms I know he’ll give me.
Randomize
