Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
Just tried calling my phone on my phone because i thought i lost my phone.
shhh. i hid the ranch dip behind the rooster. don't tell anyone that way you can find it in the morning and it won't be all eaten.
wrong number but thanks
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
like a dude with a badge in a golf cart is gunna do shit. Unless he has a tazer. Then it's fair game.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
Grandma and I are gonna see the new Tarzan movie, because we both appreciate shirtless Swedish men
So I met one of her cousins last night. She recognized me as "the guy that's always in the liquor store", I may have a problem.
Do you have any idea how awkward it was to type ‘dog twerking’ into google search? Because I don’t think you do.
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
...blackout vacation is awesome. Where did you end up? I think i'm in Miami.
Hospital.
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