but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
You hit on the cop telling him you were celebrating the anniversary of your 21st birthday and ur boob job... That's how he got ur #
ah tequila...
Maybe walking up to the cops busting our party with a "Things go better with Coke" t-shirt on and asking for my extra license back that my little brother got busted with wasn't the best idea of the night.
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
They ran out of toilet paper, so I had a girl rip down the streamers so I could wipe.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
Randomize
