My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
We found a stripper pole in your closet. It seemed like a good idea. Alex will fix the hole in your wall. Sorry.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
And then you refused to pee in anything but a sink
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
Who the fuck just called me and played funkytown
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
I have to close one eye, because I don't wanna see two movies, I only want to see one.
Randomize
