if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
Redeem this text for a blowjob
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
make sure i look cute passed out on the couch.
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I just broke a sweat shaving my own vagina. Something has got to change.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
You. Me. A bottle of Vodka. The wilderness.
I found a fingernail in my vagina. A fingernail.
Either I'm too drunk or she gave me a hand job to the rhythm of jingle bells.
Can I write your parents a thank-you note for your huge dick?
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
Randomize
