And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
You bit the bartender when he refused to poor rum in your purse and hand you a straw.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
Just walked by a girl saying to her friend "honestly you coulda given me any dude and I woulda fucked him"
You should've introduced yourself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
I described my life as a 7 layer cake of death
Your not drunk until you have to grab on to the grass to keep from falling off the earth.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize