why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
You know its going to be a good homecoming when you beer bong a mimosa at 6am.
So the guy sitting next to me is watching dungeons and dragons on youtube. I didnt realize you could get more pathetic than actually playing the game.
On my arm I have 12 dashes, and below is written "plus 2 pretty stout whiskey drinks, so, you be the judge"
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
Batchelotette party success. I woke up on the floor in nothing but a thong, a garter and a shirt that says Just Do Me.
Happy Halloween!! Last Halloween we spent together you got brought home in a shopping cart
Also this just in, I think you could see my sequins underwear that say unwrap me through my leggings all day while I hung out with his family
I shaved my asshole for this. That's real dedication.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
They were playing some sort of fast food scavenger hunt game as an ice breaker. Some chick stamped a Starbucks logo on my hand and told me to go find the girl with the matching stamp and fill her with cream.
Dave had an Arby’s stamp and some sorority girl grabbed him and screamed “I’ve have the meat!”\n
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