Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
I just saw the preacher from the church I grew up in while I was buying condoms at the drugstore... he remembered me.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
you are getting stockholm syndrome from your pubes
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
was i strangled at any point last night? or was his dick just that long
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
I. Put. Them. Back. We are NOT making a habit of jail visits.
Well I just put wine in my tea
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
He asked if I was alright. I said "Yeah, I'm just an incapacitated ball of orgasmic bliss right now."
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
Planning a vacation around my dog. I have become one of those dog moms.
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