I seriously can't date anymore I forgot how to hide my crazy
All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
Grow some girl-balls and come out already
We were so bored at work tonight that we were in dry storage taking turns pouring the boxed wine we use for cooking into each others' mouths. I think I'm starting to understand the "problem" aspect of "drinking problem."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i love that feeling when you wake up and have no idea how you got back to your dorm or why you have mac and cheese on your cheeks and eyelashes in your mouth
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
My puke in the shower morning just turned into a puke in the restroom at work afternoon. I'm the human embodiment of dumpster fire.
last night I learned that if you try to buy tacos in this town, that you will be stopped by three cop cars with breathalizers
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
Been there. Done that. Still have his t-shirt.
Randomize