Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
My vagina is in bus station locker number 1465.You can go talk to it if u like -in the mean time I’m going 2show up drunk and embarrass u at work.
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I feel bad for the next person that's gonna live in my room. There's so much semen on the carpet
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Bjs on a first date are the gateway to getting to know someone for who they really are.
Um, you were throwing up the shocker symbol in front of all of the wedding guests during the best man's speech. No wonder the groom thinks we're bad
The 3 year old I'm babysitting is the first guy to tell me he loves me sober in like 2 years
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
There is pretty much a target on everyone's lips when I am drunk. EVERYONE
He just kept mumbling that he was too drunk for society and then he peed in a bush
She wasn't one for labels or anything serious really but while she was riding me she yelled marry me. It's like she fucked her self into commitment lmao she realy is a keeper bro
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Randomize
