I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
dude, the building's fire alarm was going off for over an hour last night and you didn't move
that's ok, when I'm passed out drunk I'm impervious to flame
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
I have to brush my teeth today to feel like I did something.
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
I want a nosebag of coke after my exam. Like what horses have. Coked up horses. No excuses. I love you.
exactly. I want him to have to live with the fact that he fucked me. I want him to look me in the eye and say "you were a drunken mistake".
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
Before he comes over remember the house standards. Ask yourself "will he stalk my sister or myself in the future?". If the answer is yes, then no, he isn't allowed.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
i just ran butt naked down the hall and someone highfived me. i love college.
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
I'm going to draw something on my chest and I need to incorporate my nipples. Any ideas?
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