Say my name once during sex just to fuck with her. Like when it gets rough.
xbox live and facebook are tricking me into believing I actually have an active social life
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
We watched a biography of Frida Kahlo in class today. It was depressing. A chick with a UNIBROW just put my sex life to shame.
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
all I heard when I woke up this morning was "BONG HITS FOR BREAKFAST" being yelled repeatedly.
Ja rule starts his prison sentence today #3475th reason we should drink tonight
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
My ninety day supply of adderal just came in the mail and I literally just dumped all 180 pills into my hands and laughed like a maniac. Shits about to get cray
I rocked his world in the back of my car in an overly-lit, heavily trafficked parking lot. Middle age is amazing!
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
You laid on the floor and pet their rug. and then demanded Voss water.
Randomize
