ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
It's so hard to take my boss as an authorative figure with her New Moon movie tickets taped to her wall
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
he yelled at me for calling the fat girl fat. if I can't call out fat girls to my brother who do i have?
Are you seriously trying to guilt me into sending you naked pictures by saying "So I can look at them during dialysis" ?
Is it working?
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
It's Wednesday. And it's about that time to remind everyone that my priorities from last weekend have not changed moving forward into this weekend.
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
I don’t understand his energy
What? Nice? Lmao
Randomize
