I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
This is what my life has come to. Like, I may or may not have just stolen pizza from the guy I just hooked up with's fridge when I left...
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
It's like Guy Diamond blew glitter into my vagina.
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