i cant wait for all this BS that is happening with Tiger to happen to Tebow
did i have both of my shoes on when the bouncer threw us out last night?
i think you broke pat's ankle when you drove over it... he's freaking out but on a more serious note i'm 99% sure i saw a werewolf
Attention: due to the power outage we will not be playing drinking games and watching the royal wedding. Bring your own bottle and we'll just drink in silence.
I was puzzled last night that there were shots waiting for us when we got there. Just read my messages and saw you were ordering from the bar via texts.
Is it cheating if its a threesome? This is more like a party game than infidelity.
I'll always remember you bringing me that pregnancy test in the middle of an ice storm. Best friend ever.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
That's good. Don't want to see you bellydancing in prison for homemade wine.
They've taken all the lighthearted fun out of S&M.
Can you send me the pic of me puking with a quesadilla on my shoulder
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
hey. this is your former cousin. you boned my best friend last night.
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